Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Finally Fall

Don't you just love the colors of fall?  I do!  Love everything about fall, with the possible exception of football.  Just not a fan.  Though I try, I just don't seem to understand the game and can't wrap my head around the fervor that surrounds it.  Growing up I remember my Dad watching football and getting so excited watching his team play.  He is one of those fans that yell at the television screen, know all the players by name and number, whose mood is actually dictated by how his team did on Sunday or Monday.  You know the type.  Now that he is getting a little older we often worry about him, when his team is having a close game or suffering from poor calls.  Though I must admit that I was very relieved to hear that he had seen a doctor who declared that he had a strong heart.  Good to know, as I often feared that  his favorite TV past-time would lead to a hear attack!   When Jim and I married I knew that he too was quite a fan of the game so when we were together for a game for the first time I remember saying to him 'I thought you  liked football?'  He told me that he did and wondered why I had asked, 'Because you're so quiet'.  A very different type of fan he is!  Everyone in the family is pretty much a fan of the game, I am the one hold out.  It's like a different language to me, and if we are watching it on TV there isn't even any pretty scenery or people watching to do.  B-O-R-I-N-G!  My 2 sisters are die hard fans. RABID!  They love to retell the story about me being at a college football game and watching people in the stands.  I leaned over to Jim and asked him what D Gate meant.  He didn't know what I meant and I showed him in the stands there were a couple of kids one holding a large letter 'D' and the others holding what I thought was a gate.  He laughing told me that it was a fence and that it meant 'defense'.  My sister and her kids will just randomly call me up during football season and yell D-GATE!  I thought it was a perfectly logical question.  Obviously others felt differently.
The above picture is courtesy of Pinterest, but I must tell you that it looks a great deal like a lake in the area where I grew up.  The fall was breathtakingly beautiful!  I used to love to go out and walk or ride in the woods as we called them.  There was a large rock that jutted out over a ridge and the view from there was just beautiful, it was one of my favorite spots to sit and think, to write, to dream.  I kind of miss having a special spot.  I'd like to be  there now or here:

I am still in a state of ambivilance.  Not quite sure what to do with myself.  This too shall pass, I am sure of it.  I just am not sure of how to get past it at this point.  I am struggling and that is not really like me.  I don't like feeling this way and truth be told I may be on the verge of a depression.
See that spot just beneath the wave?  I feel like that is me, and I am just waiting for the wave to hit and take me under.  Really unlike me.  I need to focus and reconnect, but the tears keep threatening to overtake me.  Why do I go there?  I know that I should just try and stay cheery and I am doing my best, but sometimes I've got to let it out.  And really, it doesn't help that I am surrounded by stupid people!  Not at home mind you.  But so often elsewhere, let's just say that too many people put their mouth in gear before fully engaging their brains.  Sometimes it wouldn't make much difference if they did engage their brains!  And I am NOT what you might call the most patient of people. 
Say a prayer for me will you?  I need all the help I can get and I mean that.

Now, I'll leave you with a few cards that I made recently.
First up is this one made with Inky Antic Stamps

If you can't read it, sentiment says: 'My husband said he'd leave me if I bought one more thing...' Inside: 'I'll miss him...'
Colored with pastel pencils.
This is colored with Copics and for that touch of sparkle-Smooch! Inside is a Hershey midget

Little messy on the sentiment, but love the inchworm and the filmstrip stencil. 
That's it for now.

1 comment:

  1. Love the pictures. You are strong and let your faith guide you. Remember He is always with you.