Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Too Much Activity...

and my back is killing me!  Has been killing me.  It is getting worse and I am not sure what to do about it.  I feel like I am at a point where I am grumpy and over tired and just plain miserable.  I know that you may be thinking 'go to the doctor you dolt', but it's not that simple.  When I go to the doctor's office with this type of complaint, I am given a cursory examination and then they chalk it up to the muscular dystrophy and say that there is really nothing that they can do about it.  So it seems like a waste of both my time and theirs.  Besides, I have to go through that whole getting on the scale thing too and really, I don't want to have to go through that if not absolutely necessary!  So what do I do?  I have been doing some stretching exercises that the doctor had given me when I went to Kennedy Kreiger back in February/March but they are not helping.  Maybe my only option at this point is to bite the bullet and go back to physical therapy, but oh how I hate that.  I am not sure why, but I really don't like going!  It is an hour out of my day that I don't have, it is hard work, I have to dress in sweat clothes (yuck!), never mind sweat, none of it is appealing; but I guess I may have to do it.  Just wish there was a magic panacea that I could take and the pain would just go away and my back would be fixed and I wouldn't have problems with it again.  The worst part of it all is, they don't know what it is, so they can't fix it-just treat it.  Story of my life!  Do I sound a little down?  Sorry.  Sometimes it all gets to me.  It can be so frustrating sometimes!  I don't want to be like this.
It is as though my body has betrayed me and I want to be the way I was.  But I can't go back.  And if I could, at what price? 
                                        Who would have to pay to alleviate my suffering?     Is the pain worth the cost?

         IN         MY          HEART          THE   ANSWER      LIES.... IT IS THERE...WAITING,

                                                  TO                                      BE            

I know the answer, because it was put there long ago.  By a heart far larger than mine.  By someone who know so much more about sacrifice than I ever will.  Someone who gave up so much more than I can ever dream of.  Christ.  He died for me.  He gave His life for me.  So that I can be free from sin.  So that I can have everlasting life.  For you too, for all of us.  And all that He asks of us in return is that we accept Him as our Saviour.  He gives so much, yet asks so little in return. 

So, who am I?  To complain?  To ask for more?  

                            While I may complain at times, I won't ask for my this disease to be taken from me.  The price would be too much to bear.  Because though I may suffer at times,  though I may feel down, I know-are you listening because this is important?-I know that I am never, NEVER alone.

                                                Sweet Comfort.       Such Relief!

                              Two                    little                  words            that        mean      so           much ,            that                help                    me                   each         step          of        my                          journey.           NEVER             ALONE.

     He is with me.  And that is all I need.  That is the panacea that I need, the button I can push to make it bearable.  Think about it...

On another note, if you want to see some beautiful hand made jewelry like this:
 where she is hosting a special giveaway!  Beautiful stuff!!


1 comment:

  1. I am sorry you are going through this.
    I too suffer from health issues, some days my stomach hurts so much I can't move and just want to lay down and cry. But I know it will pass.
    Hope you feel better soon. And maybe try the therapy again, if you feel it works.